Wow it's been a while.
Last week was the final week of school: finals, graduation, out.
Finals went fairly well. 4 students got a D or lower, which means they will need to repeat the course. One I saw coming: this student had checked out from day 1, their average was below %50 going into the final, done deal. Two were somewhat of a surprise: they were doing low Cish work, but they bombed on the final. I feel like it's a fair cop though: they both put in middling effort and definitely did not really understand what was going on.
The last was a heart-breaker, a student who worked harder than anyone else in the class, bar none, but just has *so* much trouble with math. For all of their effort, they went into the final with a high D and came out with a lower D.
Graduation was amazing. 40 students graduated in front of a huge crowd of family, extended family, and sponsors. It was interesting to see this crowd of ethnic, working-class families shoulder to shoulder with a bunch of wealthy middle-aged Silicon Valley philanthropist types, all cheering for these graduates. And boy did they cheer. There were no polite golf claps. Signs, posters, horns (like trumpets and those air horns), noise-makers, etc. Crazy.
All of the teachers wore the traditional gown and hood getup and we sat onstage with the graduates. Each student stood up in turn and one teacher shared a bit about that student (I didn't do any talking as I never had any of these students). I was particularly moved by one student who has basically acted as a parent to their younger siblings and their aunt's child. For four years they put in a full day of school, then went home to homework, housework, cooking dinner and caring for several young kids. And they did volunteer work on top of this. Amazing.
On Tuesday there was a student faculty volleyball game. It was a profound blowout: one of the teachers played NCAA volleyball, and another one is on the national team for Morocco. The two of them alone could have devastated the students. Add in two more teachers who coach and play regularly, and it was all over. I managed to do a head-on collision with another teacher (at least my head was involved) and got my head split. Game stopped, blood everywhere. Later that evening got 5 staples in my head.
I knew this would happen, but I am very sentimental and finding it difficult to let go of the students. I had them all sign my yearbook. I wrote up a final sheet of things I wanted them to learn (like non-geometry life things) and things I learned from them. And I am currently in the middle of writing emails to each one of them to point out good things I see in them and encourage them for the future. I hope that's not weird.
So now it's on to new adventures. I have a month of teaching improv to some of the students (first class is today), but that's only a few hours a week. My main gig in June will be resting and relaxing, and looking for a new job.
Bottom line: it was a great year. Absolutely no regrets at all. I was blessed beyond words to get to work at such a great school. And, contrary to my initial concerns, it has only made the future seem more open and full of possibilities. While I am still sorting all kinds of things out, I am much more comfortable now with who I am and what I want to do. And, just as important, who I am not and what I don't want to do.
If anyone reading this has ever thought about taking a year to teach, I'd recommend it. There were plenty of challenges and frustrations, but all totally worth it.
Thanks for reading!
Wednesday, June 2, 2010
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Doity Rat
I have been struggling recently with some of the students in resource. They just seem to have given up. In class they are easily distracted, joking, wandering, forgetting materials, going to the bathroom, doing anything but work. And when I try to help them with a problem they are actively hostile, like get out of my face.
Today, the mother of one such student wrote an email to ask how things are going.
Well, well, well....
I wrote back to her, cc-ing the student, about the state of things. She wrote back, understandably disappointed in her child. I have to say I wickedly savored the idea that this student is going to get chewed out by Mom when they get home.
But now I am having second thoughts. While I won the battle (I have an ally in motivating the student to change their ways), I may lose the war because I was a rat fink and played the Mom card. That may firmly and permanently put me in the bad guy camp. Where I probably already live. As the Earl of Badness.
Today, the mother of one such student wrote an email to ask how things are going.
Well, well, well....
I wrote back to her, cc-ing the student, about the state of things. She wrote back, understandably disappointed in her child. I have to say I wickedly savored the idea that this student is going to get chewed out by Mom when they get home.
But now I am having second thoughts. While I won the battle (I have an ally in motivating the student to change their ways), I may lose the war because I was a rat fink and played the Mom card. That may firmly and permanently put me in the bad guy camp. Where I probably already live. As the Earl of Badness.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Waiting for Superman
I just saw this trailer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKTfaro96dg
It literally made me cry, just the trailer. It's so overwhelming to think about the scope of the problem. I see the people at Eastside working so hard and making a tremendous difference, but relatively speaking it's such a tiny fraction of all the students who really need help.
Just thinking about it stirs up all these questions about what my next move should be. Can I really walk away from this?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZKTfaro96dg
It literally made me cry, just the trailer. It's so overwhelming to think about the scope of the problem. I see the people at Eastside working so hard and making a tremendous difference, but relatively speaking it's such a tiny fraction of all the students who really need help.
Just thinking about it stirs up all these questions about what my next move should be. Can I really walk away from this?
Saturday, May 8, 2010
The Payoff
On Weds, I think it was, they had what they call the "College Assembly", a yearly tradition at Eastside.
Once again (like every year in the school's history), every single graduating senior got into at least one four-year college, and will be attending in the fall.
One of the teachers made a PowerPoint presentation from all this. There's a little piece on each school where an Eastside graduate will be going. They announce the school and the seniors who will be going there come out on stage, all decked out in college gear (sweatshirts and hats) and holding signs and posters for the school, cheering and pumping their fists and all. They give some interesting facts on the school (year of founding, size, famous alumni), and the number of past Eastside graduates who went to or are still enrolled at that school.
And the all the rest of the school, freshmen through juniors, along with the teachers, are in the audience cheering like crazy.
It was so, so, so cool. Definitely made me tear up. I think about how hard all the kids in my class work, the 9 hour school days, the late work, etc. All paying off in this huge, tremendous victory. These kids are going to college, the first in their family.
And we are talking some great schools, too. Barnard, Pomona, Occidental, UCLA, and *3* going to Stanford. That last one blew me away. In a graduating class of 40 students, from the poorest neighborhoods in the Bay Area, we are sending *3* kids to Stanford.
They ended with all the seniors onstage, and then they announced the amount of financial aid they got, all told. I forgot that number but it was a *lot*. For most of these kids college is out of the question without some financial aid, and Eastside has the financial-aid-getting game down to a science.
It was very moving for me, and I don't really know the kids who were graduating. I saw their faces all year but never had them in my classes. I can only imagine if they were kids I had been teaching for the past 4 year, or in some cases 6 (those who came through the middle school). I would be crying like a little girl (sorry little girls, first analogy that came to mind).
I am *really* going to miss this place.
Once again (like every year in the school's history), every single graduating senior got into at least one four-year college, and will be attending in the fall.
One of the teachers made a PowerPoint presentation from all this. There's a little piece on each school where an Eastside graduate will be going. They announce the school and the seniors who will be going there come out on stage, all decked out in college gear (sweatshirts and hats) and holding signs and posters for the school, cheering and pumping their fists and all. They give some interesting facts on the school (year of founding, size, famous alumni), and the number of past Eastside graduates who went to or are still enrolled at that school.
And the all the rest of the school, freshmen through juniors, along with the teachers, are in the audience cheering like crazy.
It was so, so, so cool. Definitely made me tear up. I think about how hard all the kids in my class work, the 9 hour school days, the late work, etc. All paying off in this huge, tremendous victory. These kids are going to college, the first in their family.
And we are talking some great schools, too. Barnard, Pomona, Occidental, UCLA, and *3* going to Stanford. That last one blew me away. In a graduating class of 40 students, from the poorest neighborhoods in the Bay Area, we are sending *3* kids to Stanford.
They ended with all the seniors onstage, and then they announced the amount of financial aid they got, all told. I forgot that number but it was a *lot*. For most of these kids college is out of the question without some financial aid, and Eastside has the financial-aid-getting game down to a science.
It was very moving for me, and I don't really know the kids who were graduating. I saw their faces all year but never had them in my classes. I can only imagine if they were kids I had been teaching for the past 4 year, or in some cases 6 (those who came through the middle school). I would be crying like a little girl (sorry little girls, first analogy that came to mind).
I am *really* going to miss this place.
Thursday, April 29, 2010
3d!!!
I am pretty concerned about this chapter on surface area and volume, some students are really struggling.
I spoke to some of the other math teachers about it and they made some interesting points.
Some of the students have a hard time understanding the line drawings as 3-d objects. To me that comes so natural, it hadn't even crossed my mind that they might have that issue. But now that they mention it I can see their point: it may be very confusing to look at a series of black lines on a page and try to move that into 3-d space, especially when you can't rotate the drawing or see it from different angles. And the real kicker is I don't know how to explain it: how you teach someone to visualize a 3-d object based on a line drawing? How you do you lead someone to "see" something, or form a mental image?
Also, composite objects are always a problem. A shape made up of a cylinder, a block, and a hemisphere will freak them out every time.
The other teachers suggested using lots (and lots) of real 3-d models in class. And to work at it 'backwards': instead of starting with a composite object and pulling it apart into simpler shapes, start with simpler shapes. Get them to buy into the idea that this one has volume V and that one has volume Q. What's the volume of both of them together? V + Q. What if I physically stick them together, now what's the volume? V + Q. What if I move the pieces around and stick them together in a different configuration? Etc.
I tried this today and it had some success. More people seemed to be getting it. I took a cyclindrical can of wipes and taped two hemispheres to either end (rougly same radius) so I had a capsule shape, and we talked about finding the volume and surface area.
Which brought up another tricky point: with volume you can just break into parts and add: Part 1 + part 2 + part 3. But for surface area it's a mess because when you stick parts together, things that were on the surface are no longer on the surface. One student in particular was having such a hard time with this. They could not understand why the lid and bottom of the can of wipes didn't count towards the surface area of the whole capsule (probably didn't help that the hemispheres were see-through, so you could still actually see the bases of the cylinder when they whole capsule was assembled.
The good news in all this is I am feeling more free to slow down. We have a final at the end of May and this is the last chapter of really new material. The next chapter is more prep for the SAT (review) and prep for the final. So I feel like I can lose a day and just slow down to review things, play with models, try to dig deeper into existing subjects. If we were in the middle of the year I might have been more uptight about spending so much time today on just the one capsule problem, but I think it was time well spent.
Because I wanted to spend time on the model business, I was trying to rush in just presenting the new topics: surface area and volume of sphere. I was really tempted to just give them the formulae and call it day, no explaination of why it's true. This class in particular seems to not really care "why". When I covered surface area I gave a handwavy explaination that you can imagine peeling the cover off a baseball, it makes two peanuts, each lobe of each peanut is roughly a circle of radius r, total is 4 * pi * r^2. When I got to volume of a cube (4/3 * pi * r ^3), I didn't even bother with a 'why' because the 'why' is pretty complicated. I thought they wouldn't care.
Then this one student, who has really struggled and generally been pretty volatile at times, raises their hand with a big smile and says "Why is that"? They really seemed to want to know. So I took a few minutes to explain it all. Not sure it registered but it was touching to me that that student in particular proved me wrong: they are curious.
I spoke to some of the other math teachers about it and they made some interesting points.
Some of the students have a hard time understanding the line drawings as 3-d objects. To me that comes so natural, it hadn't even crossed my mind that they might have that issue. But now that they mention it I can see their point: it may be very confusing to look at a series of black lines on a page and try to move that into 3-d space, especially when you can't rotate the drawing or see it from different angles. And the real kicker is I don't know how to explain it: how you teach someone to visualize a 3-d object based on a line drawing? How you do you lead someone to "see" something, or form a mental image?
Also, composite objects are always a problem. A shape made up of a cylinder, a block, and a hemisphere will freak them out every time.
The other teachers suggested using lots (and lots) of real 3-d models in class. And to work at it 'backwards': instead of starting with a composite object and pulling it apart into simpler shapes, start with simpler shapes. Get them to buy into the idea that this one has volume V and that one has volume Q. What's the volume of both of them together? V + Q. What if I physically stick them together, now what's the volume? V + Q. What if I move the pieces around and stick them together in a different configuration? Etc.
I tried this today and it had some success. More people seemed to be getting it. I took a cyclindrical can of wipes and taped two hemispheres to either end (rougly same radius) so I had a capsule shape, and we talked about finding the volume and surface area.
Which brought up another tricky point: with volume you can just break into parts and add: Part 1 + part 2 + part 3. But for surface area it's a mess because when you stick parts together, things that were on the surface are no longer on the surface. One student in particular was having such a hard time with this. They could not understand why the lid and bottom of the can of wipes didn't count towards the surface area of the whole capsule (probably didn't help that the hemispheres were see-through, so you could still actually see the bases of the cylinder when they whole capsule was assembled.
The good news in all this is I am feeling more free to slow down. We have a final at the end of May and this is the last chapter of really new material. The next chapter is more prep for the SAT (review) and prep for the final. So I feel like I can lose a day and just slow down to review things, play with models, try to dig deeper into existing subjects. If we were in the middle of the year I might have been more uptight about spending so much time today on just the one capsule problem, but I think it was time well spent.
Because I wanted to spend time on the model business, I was trying to rush in just presenting the new topics: surface area and volume of sphere. I was really tempted to just give them the formulae and call it day, no explaination of why it's true. This class in particular seems to not really care "why". When I covered surface area I gave a handwavy explaination that you can imagine peeling the cover off a baseball, it makes two peanuts, each lobe of each peanut is roughly a circle of radius r, total is 4 * pi * r^2. When I got to volume of a cube (4/3 * pi * r ^3), I didn't even bother with a 'why' because the 'why' is pretty complicated. I thought they wouldn't care.
Then this one student, who has really struggled and generally been pretty volatile at times, raises their hand with a big smile and says "Why is that"? They really seemed to want to know. So I took a few minutes to explain it all. Not sure it registered but it was touching to me that that student in particular proved me wrong: they are curious.
Monday, April 26, 2010
Inertia
The new chapter has to do with finding the surface area of geometric solids. Started with prisms, and that involves finding the area of the polygon at the base.
We had several lessons on finding the area of polygons back in Chapter 5 (this is chapter 10).
I was surprised at how they handled this on the first set of homework. Maybe not so much surprised as disheartened. On so many papers I see the evidence of the same pattern:
* I don't remember how to find the area of a polygon.
* It's too much work to look back in the book or at earlier notes.
* I will just copy the answer out of the back of the book (evident because the entire answer is just a number, with no indication they did any actual calculations).
The first point is a bummer but there you go: for those who approach this as "memorize random facts without really understanding why", I can understand that those facts will atrophy pretty quick.
But the second and third ones are even more discouraging. Rather than do even a little work, I will resort to trickery. This homework problem is worth a tiny tiny portion of my grade, but I'm going to take a shortcut here that guarantees I won't really understand anything.
Grumble grumble.
I am very tempted to give a quiz, just to the ones who clearly did the copying, where I ask them the exact same questions.
We had several lessons on finding the area of polygons back in Chapter 5 (this is chapter 10).
I was surprised at how they handled this on the first set of homework. Maybe not so much surprised as disheartened. On so many papers I see the evidence of the same pattern:
* I don't remember how to find the area of a polygon.
* It's too much work to look back in the book or at earlier notes.
* I will just copy the answer out of the back of the book (evident because the entire answer is just a number, with no indication they did any actual calculations).
The first point is a bummer but there you go: for those who approach this as "memorize random facts without really understanding why", I can understand that those facts will atrophy pretty quick.
But the second and third ones are even more discouraging. Rather than do even a little work, I will resort to trickery. This homework problem is worth a tiny tiny portion of my grade, but I'm going to take a shortcut here that guarantees I won't really understand anything.
Grumble grumble.
I am very tempted to give a quiz, just to the ones who clearly did the copying, where I ask them the exact same questions.
Monday, April 19, 2010
Rounding
I just graded 2/3 of the trig tests. So far so good: scores are generally higher than they have been. And in some cases, students who have really been struggling got A's, which is very gratifying.
But...
There was a lot of trouble with rounding. Again, I keep getting surprised by what they stumble over. They are doing trig like nobody's business, setting up the ratios correctly and all. But all kinds of trouble comes up with rounding the answer.
The test says at the top "Round all answers to the nearest tenth". Some individual questions say "Round to the nearest foot" or whatever. In all classes I specifically called these out, multiple times. "Note that all answers should be rounded to the nearest 10th, unless the directions specifically say otherwise." Still, lots of people missed it altogether, just rounded willy nilly.
Then, there's confusion about when to round. Even though we talked about when to round (at the very end) in class, they are still taking the trig ration (e.g. 0.234576...), then rounding *that* to the nearest 10th (0.2), then using that for the rest of the calculations.
Finally, there's confusion about how to round. Some of them think rounding to the nearest tenth is the same as rounding to the nearest ten. Some think that means using the tenth decimal to round the one decimal up or down. Etc.
The net result being some people lost up to a fifth of the total points on rounding alone. Which I felt really conflicted about. On one hand, the main 'point' of the test is trig, and they are doing the trig basically right. On the other hand, we definitely spent time in class talking about all this (directions, when to round, how to round). And at the end of the day, the answer they are giving is wrong. In the merciless world of standardized tests, there will no grace given for rounding incorrectly. So I want to get their attention now, when it matters less.
Still I feel like an ogre.
But...
There was a lot of trouble with rounding. Again, I keep getting surprised by what they stumble over. They are doing trig like nobody's business, setting up the ratios correctly and all. But all kinds of trouble comes up with rounding the answer.
The test says at the top "Round all answers to the nearest tenth". Some individual questions say "Round to the nearest foot" or whatever. In all classes I specifically called these out, multiple times. "Note that all answers should be rounded to the nearest 10th, unless the directions specifically say otherwise." Still, lots of people missed it altogether, just rounded willy nilly.
Then, there's confusion about when to round. Even though we talked about when to round (at the very end) in class, they are still taking the trig ration (e.g. 0.234576...), then rounding *that* to the nearest 10th (0.2), then using that for the rest of the calculations.
Finally, there's confusion about how to round. Some of them think rounding to the nearest tenth is the same as rounding to the nearest ten. Some think that means using the tenth decimal to round the one decimal up or down. Etc.
The net result being some people lost up to a fifth of the total points on rounding alone. Which I felt really conflicted about. On one hand, the main 'point' of the test is trig, and they are doing the trig basically right. On the other hand, we definitely spent time in class talking about all this (directions, when to round, how to round). And at the end of the day, the answer they are giving is wrong. In the merciless world of standardized tests, there will no grace given for rounding incorrectly. So I want to get their attention now, when it matters less.
Still I feel like an ogre.
Friday, April 16, 2010
SohCahToa
We are covering trig functions. Yet another reminder I have no idea what I am doing. I thought, looking over the chapter, that this would be a complete trainwreck. It requires a certain capacity to visualize and rotate objects in space, to realize that X is positioned relative to Y, to remember certain arcana that this ratio is called sine and that one is called cosine, and to do inverse trig functions when necessary to find angle measures.
I was wrong.
They are taking to this like ducks to water. Several of the students who have struggled the most in the past have called this "easy". They love the SohCahToa memory device (sine = opposite/hypoteneuse, cosine = adjacent/hypoteneuse, tangent = opposite/adjacent). I find it written on everything: quizzes, homework, margin of the book. It's like the new graffiti.
What really baffles me is that these are the same kids whose brains exploded over 45/45/90 triangles and 30/60/90 triangles. I could not, for the life of me, get them to remember the ratios for these particular instances, but they can remember how to set it up in the general case. *My* brain just exploded.
I was wrong.
They are taking to this like ducks to water. Several of the students who have struggled the most in the past have called this "easy". They love the SohCahToa memory device (sine = opposite/hypoteneuse, cosine = adjacent/hypoteneuse, tangent = opposite/adjacent). I find it written on everything: quizzes, homework, margin of the book. It's like the new graffiti.
What really baffles me is that these are the same kids whose brains exploded over 45/45/90 triangles and 30/60/90 triangles. I could not, for the life of me, get them to remember the ratios for these particular instances, but they can remember how to set it up in the general case. *My* brain just exploded.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Spring Break
First day back after spring break.
I have heard this many times and many ways in my life, but over this break it made more sense to me than it ever has: money isn't everything.
I was enjoying the time off *so much*, time to just be still, rest, read a book, do whatever. And I realized I will have this *all summer long* (at least until I start looking for a new job). And that's pretty amazing.
The culture I come from (Silicon Valley startup land) has this built-in assumption that you live to work. A 60 hour work week is typical, 40 is embarrassingly low, anything less is just shameful. Makes sense if you find it all fun, if you'd be doing this whether or not you get paid. But if you're doing it just for the money, it's a pretty poor tradeoff. Yes you can get money that way, but at the expense of something even more precious: your life. The few waking hours you have while you're young.
Again, probably old news to most people, but it really hit home this past week. I just noticed how pleasant it is to have time to myself, and I realized it might be a perfectly legitimate choice to decide to preserve some of that time, in spite of the "live to work" culture I'm in.
In completely unrelated news, over the weekend someone made sandwiches out of leftover pancakes, and they were called either sandcakes (unappetizing) or panwiches. I can't believe one or the other of these terms has not become common in English already.
I have heard this many times and many ways in my life, but over this break it made more sense to me than it ever has: money isn't everything.
I was enjoying the time off *so much*, time to just be still, rest, read a book, do whatever. And I realized I will have this *all summer long* (at least until I start looking for a new job). And that's pretty amazing.
The culture I come from (Silicon Valley startup land) has this built-in assumption that you live to work. A 60 hour work week is typical, 40 is embarrassingly low, anything less is just shameful. Makes sense if you find it all fun, if you'd be doing this whether or not you get paid. But if you're doing it just for the money, it's a pretty poor tradeoff. Yes you can get money that way, but at the expense of something even more precious: your life. The few waking hours you have while you're young.
Again, probably old news to most people, but it really hit home this past week. I just noticed how pleasant it is to have time to myself, and I realized it might be a perfectly legitimate choice to decide to preserve some of that time, in spite of the "live to work" culture I'm in.
In completely unrelated news, over the weekend someone made sandwiches out of leftover pancakes, and they were called either sandcakes (unappetizing) or panwiches. I can't believe one or the other of these terms has not become common in English already.
Thursday, March 25, 2010
Different worlds
Kind of jarring experience today.
In the morning I'm grading tests from my students, who are still struggling. These tests were better, but still they are not really 'getting' it. They can memorize rules, but don't really understand what it all means, and easily get confused trying to apply the rules in new settings.
Then I went to Google for volleyball, and was reminded how incredibly sharp the engineers are there. They can design algorthms to manage terrabytes of data, plan out and implement complex distributed software systems, etc. I left Google feeling just dumb: these guys have a mastery of software that I could never get. And along with that felt kind of worthless. I slipped back into the mindset that was making me nuts at Google: there's one metric of worth, it's engineering skill, and I'm not measuring up.
Then back to school. And there was just this weird dissonance. There are so, so many people who don't like math, aren't engineers, will never be good at math, etc. It's so ridiculous to put so much value on it. But still I felt it so strongly, this sense that I need to 'fix' myself by becoming a better engineer.
??!?!?!
In the morning I'm grading tests from my students, who are still struggling. These tests were better, but still they are not really 'getting' it. They can memorize rules, but don't really understand what it all means, and easily get confused trying to apply the rules in new settings.
Then I went to Google for volleyball, and was reminded how incredibly sharp the engineers are there. They can design algorthms to manage terrabytes of data, plan out and implement complex distributed software systems, etc. I left Google feeling just dumb: these guys have a mastery of software that I could never get. And along with that felt kind of worthless. I slipped back into the mindset that was making me nuts at Google: there's one metric of worth, it's engineering skill, and I'm not measuring up.
Then back to school. And there was just this weird dissonance. There are so, so many people who don't like math, aren't engineers, will never be good at math, etc. It's so ridiculous to put so much value on it. But still I felt it so strongly, this sense that I need to 'fix' myself by becoming a better engineer.
??!?!?!
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Fake Cheese?
OK I know I commented on this earlier, but I just noticed that the ad Google attached to my last post is for "Soy Free Cheese Alternatives".
I can't imagine that that's in any way related to anything I wrote in the post.
And I hate cheese alternatives. That's kind of one of my basic philosophies on life: No cheese alternatives.
And, while I'm on the subject, since I'm sure like a million people are reading this blog and clicking on ads for cheese alternatives and goth dates, where's my cut of the royalties, Google? Mmmm??
I can't imagine that that's in any way related to anything I wrote in the post.
And I hate cheese alternatives. That's kind of one of my basic philosophies on life: No cheese alternatives.
And, while I'm on the subject, since I'm sure like a million people are reading this blog and clicking on ads for cheese alternatives and goth dates, where's my cut of the royalties, Google? Mmmm??
Past and future
Had lunch with former co-workers from Google the other day. Very nice to see them and catch up. It was noteworthy to me what did and didn't come up emotionally for me with this meeting. I can be very sentimental and often when I connect with someone or something from my past I find myself wishing I could go back, re-create that situation.
But while I found that I missed the people, and I could appreciate that the snacks and perks at Google were great, I didn't leave with any sense of "I want to go back" or "I should not have left".
The teaching still unfolds as a daily drama or comedy, depending on the day. I think I am less hyper than I was before, more moderate in my expectations of what I can do or what I can get them to do. But the setbacks and disappointments are more painful somehow because I have really, really tried to strategize and learn from my mistakes, but the overall trend is still down. Test scores down, quizzes down. And so each week I'm like "THIS time we're going to do (insert new strategy) to make sure they are ready for the quizzes and tests", and then I think I'm seeing progress going into the quiz or test, then the grades come back worse than ever.
And as the end of the school year is on the horizon (MAN that went fast) I am thinking more and more about what's next. I think I am going to teach an improv class here in the early months of the summer. Before I exit the scene I'd like to get some time just to do something fun and playful with the kids, without any notion of pass/fail.
And then.... then I don't know. Possibly back to software with just a new perspective. Possibly on to something that's software + X (e.g. sales engineering). Possibily something with an aspect of teaching but more in the corporate space (e.g. professional training). Emu farm?
But while I found that I missed the people, and I could appreciate that the snacks and perks at Google were great, I didn't leave with any sense of "I want to go back" or "I should not have left".
The teaching still unfolds as a daily drama or comedy, depending on the day. I think I am less hyper than I was before, more moderate in my expectations of what I can do or what I can get them to do. But the setbacks and disappointments are more painful somehow because I have really, really tried to strategize and learn from my mistakes, but the overall trend is still down. Test scores down, quizzes down. And so each week I'm like "THIS time we're going to do (insert new strategy) to make sure they are ready for the quizzes and tests", and then I think I'm seeing progress going into the quiz or test, then the grades come back worse than ever.
And as the end of the school year is on the horizon (MAN that went fast) I am thinking more and more about what's next. I think I am going to teach an improv class here in the early months of the summer. Before I exit the scene I'd like to get some time just to do something fun and playful with the kids, without any notion of pass/fail.
And then.... then I don't know. Possibly back to software with just a new perspective. Possibly on to something that's software + X (e.g. sales engineering). Possibily something with an aspect of teaching but more in the corporate space (e.g. professional training). Emu farm?
Monday, March 8, 2010
Crime and Punishment (or not)
Gave some tests on Thurs and Friday.
On Friday one student asked to go out to the bathroom during the test. I feel like an ogre telling someone they can't go to the bathroom, so sure, you can go. A while later I notice he's been gone abnormally long.
I stick my head out the door and I see him with his head in his locker. He immediately slams the door shut and says "I wasn't cheating!".
We talk about it, he claims he was looking for his calculator. I tell him I'll let him finish the test but I'm going to report it to the principal and vice principal. He gets really upset and refuses to finish the test, just throws it on the floor. I let him cool down a bit then put it back on his desk, he finally starts working on it.
The principal comes by before the end of the test (yay email) and pulls him out of class. Principal comes back in a bit later and tells me the student has something to tell me. I step outside and the guy confesses to cheating. My heart just broke: the guy is crying, and seems very very sorry. Not just I'm getting a bad grade sorry, but I'm really ashamed of myself sorry. I dunno if it's appropriate or not but I had to give him a hug, he was just so sad. And he's generally a great kid: doesn't test well but very attentive and interested in class, and just fun and friendly. So it's all just a bummer.
By contrast, there's another student I've had to talk to several times about cheating: two conversations about copied homework and one about pretty blatantly copied answers on the final. No confession, no admitting anything, blanket denial. Each time there's a talk about consequences, don't do this again, blah blah blah. During this lates test I sat her directly in front of me, all alone, so I could prevent any more cheating. I didn't notice anything. But after the class several of her classmates told me they saw her cheating, using a cheat sheet hidden under her test. They said this is rampant: not just Geometry, this is going on in all of her classes.
Because of all the previous fu and the stone-cold denial that she's done anything wrong, I want SO BAD to just bust her, catch her red-handed. I know this is not a good approach to take, and the staff, who have a lot more experience with this, agreed: deliberately trying to catch someone is just setting yourself up for drama, and she is ultimately going to feel really shamed/humiliated in a way that is not productive. Better to have more strict guidelines to prevent cheating, and have more conversations about integrity.
But still, the fantasy of flipping over her test paper and finding a cheat sheet.... Mmmm, sweet sweet revenge....
On Friday one student asked to go out to the bathroom during the test. I feel like an ogre telling someone they can't go to the bathroom, so sure, you can go. A while later I notice he's been gone abnormally long.
I stick my head out the door and I see him with his head in his locker. He immediately slams the door shut and says "I wasn't cheating!".
We talk about it, he claims he was looking for his calculator. I tell him I'll let him finish the test but I'm going to report it to the principal and vice principal. He gets really upset and refuses to finish the test, just throws it on the floor. I let him cool down a bit then put it back on his desk, he finally starts working on it.
The principal comes by before the end of the test (yay email) and pulls him out of class. Principal comes back in a bit later and tells me the student has something to tell me. I step outside and the guy confesses to cheating. My heart just broke: the guy is crying, and seems very very sorry. Not just I'm getting a bad grade sorry, but I'm really ashamed of myself sorry. I dunno if it's appropriate or not but I had to give him a hug, he was just so sad. And he's generally a great kid: doesn't test well but very attentive and interested in class, and just fun and friendly. So it's all just a bummer.
By contrast, there's another student I've had to talk to several times about cheating: two conversations about copied homework and one about pretty blatantly copied answers on the final. No confession, no admitting anything, blanket denial. Each time there's a talk about consequences, don't do this again, blah blah blah. During this lates test I sat her directly in front of me, all alone, so I could prevent any more cheating. I didn't notice anything. But after the class several of her classmates told me they saw her cheating, using a cheat sheet hidden under her test. They said this is rampant: not just Geometry, this is going on in all of her classes.
Because of all the previous fu and the stone-cold denial that she's done anything wrong, I want SO BAD to just bust her, catch her red-handed. I know this is not a good approach to take, and the staff, who have a lot more experience with this, agreed: deliberately trying to catch someone is just setting yourself up for drama, and she is ultimately going to feel really shamed/humiliated in a way that is not productive. Better to have more strict guidelines to prevent cheating, and have more conversations about integrity.
But still, the fantasy of flipping over her test paper and finding a cheat sheet.... Mmmm, sweet sweet revenge....
Teenage Girls
One of my students had her fifteenth birthday today. For Latinas this is a big big deal. She's walking around all day with a bouquet of roses, a bunch of ballons (like not just one or two, a whole gang), a bevy of well-wishers. Her mom brought in a homemade tres leches cake. Teachers got the leftovers. MMmmm.
I handed back some tests today. They were not good (again). I was trying to get the kids going on test corrections during tutorial. One girl and guy seemed pretty distracted and unproductive, so I was sitting with them trying to get things rolling on a particular problem. The girl got it fairly quickly, but the guy was just not getting it at all. I was trying to talk him through it and it kept going in circles with him not getting it. Then abruptly the girl says "Can I go outside?". I look at her and she has tears in her eyes. I say "Sure you can go outside, is something wrong?" She says "Just my life" and runs, literally runs, out the door sobbing.
I wanted to follow but I have a class of ~20 other kids I can't just ditch. Another girl offers to go out after her and I let her go. After a while I stick my head out and see the two of them walking along laughing. They come back in and things just go back to the way they were: unproductive, distracted, etc.
I am not sure what to make of the whole thing. I don't think it was trickery on her end, I believe she was genuinely upset about something. But I don't really know what, or what changed, or how I could have/should have handled it. But I hurt for her. I can imagine that if you're in a place where you feel like your "life" is wrong, it'd be pretty hard to engage in the wild wild world of Geometry.
I handed back some tests today. They were not good (again). I was trying to get the kids going on test corrections during tutorial. One girl and guy seemed pretty distracted and unproductive, so I was sitting with them trying to get things rolling on a particular problem. The girl got it fairly quickly, but the guy was just not getting it at all. I was trying to talk him through it and it kept going in circles with him not getting it. Then abruptly the girl says "Can I go outside?". I look at her and she has tears in her eyes. I say "Sure you can go outside, is something wrong?" She says "Just my life" and runs, literally runs, out the door sobbing.
I wanted to follow but I have a class of ~20 other kids I can't just ditch. Another girl offers to go out after her and I let her go. After a while I stick my head out and see the two of them walking along laughing. They come back in and things just go back to the way they were: unproductive, distracted, etc.
I am not sure what to make of the whole thing. I don't think it was trickery on her end, I believe she was genuinely upset about something. But I don't really know what, or what changed, or how I could have/should have handled it. But I hurt for her. I can imagine that if you're in a place where you feel like your "life" is wrong, it'd be pretty hard to engage in the wild wild world of Geometry.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Crimes in Ink
I have asked the kids to keep it to black or blue ink or pencil.
I am getting hot pink, burgandy, and my least favorite, bright red (the color I grade in).
I finally started docking points for using red ink. One student, who is generally very studious and concered about their grade, lost points on ink. When I passed it back I heard them mutter "You gotta be kidding me".
Favorite comment of the week.
I am getting hot pink, burgandy, and my least favorite, bright red (the color I grade in).
I finally started docking points for using red ink. One student, who is generally very studious and concered about their grade, lost points on ink. When I passed it back I heard them mutter "You gotta be kidding me".
Favorite comment of the week.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Pineapple Sherbet
I had a talk the other day with the Vice Prinicpal. Basically talking about that big question of how do you handle a struggling kid: work closely with him or point him to resources and let him work it out.
After a while the talk turned to my plans for next year.
I have been thinking about that a lot and I am pretty sure I want to move on: I am really liking this as a year of doing something different but I don't think I could do it for a career.
I had been worrying a lot about how/when to bring this up. I thought they might be angry at me, disappointed I was leaving, etc. (even though I'd told them up front that this was an experiment for me).
So I felt a little on the spot, but decided to be straightforward and told her what I was thinking.
After a few minutes of talking I realized what she was really saying: they also were viewing this as an experiment, and were planning all along to use the summer to find a credentialed teacher to replace me. One way or the other, from their POV, this was a one-year gig for me.
I asked if this was at all a question of whether I was doing a good job, and she said no it wasn't about that, they just wanted someone with credentials (she might be saying that to spare my feelings, but knowing her I think she'd say if I were screwing up somehow).
So that brougt up this weird mix of emotions. On the one hand, relief: I am not disappointing them, I am free to look for a job over the summer without feeling treacherous or sneaky, etc.
On the other hand, I felt a little hurt that they wouldn't want me back. It reminded me of a story my Grandma told me about some relative: he'd say that he hated pineapple sherbet, but when they had some for dessert he got mad because no one offered him any.
Pretty much that: I don't want it, but I want to know I could have it if I wanted.
Having that perspective has kind of changed things over the past few days. I feel a lot more affectionate towards the kids. Even if they are being irritating I realize I won't be in their lives very long so I should make it count.
At the same time, I am a lot less willing to put up with their crap. I don't need them to like me, I don't need the school to think I am a good teacher, so if they are being bratty I am a lot quicker to make it their problem and not mine. Since I got the news I have thrown 2 students out class, and made one whole class take a lap around the school (that was fun).
After a while the talk turned to my plans for next year.
I have been thinking about that a lot and I am pretty sure I want to move on: I am really liking this as a year of doing something different but I don't think I could do it for a career.
I had been worrying a lot about how/when to bring this up. I thought they might be angry at me, disappointed I was leaving, etc. (even though I'd told them up front that this was an experiment for me).
So I felt a little on the spot, but decided to be straightforward and told her what I was thinking.
After a few minutes of talking I realized what she was really saying: they also were viewing this as an experiment, and were planning all along to use the summer to find a credentialed teacher to replace me. One way or the other, from their POV, this was a one-year gig for me.
I asked if this was at all a question of whether I was doing a good job, and she said no it wasn't about that, they just wanted someone with credentials (she might be saying that to spare my feelings, but knowing her I think she'd say if I were screwing up somehow).
So that brougt up this weird mix of emotions. On the one hand, relief: I am not disappointing them, I am free to look for a job over the summer without feeling treacherous or sneaky, etc.
On the other hand, I felt a little hurt that they wouldn't want me back. It reminded me of a story my Grandma told me about some relative: he'd say that he hated pineapple sherbet, but when they had some for dessert he got mad because no one offered him any.
Pretty much that: I don't want it, but I want to know I could have it if I wanted.
Having that perspective has kind of changed things over the past few days. I feel a lot more affectionate towards the kids. Even if they are being irritating I realize I won't be in their lives very long so I should make it count.
At the same time, I am a lot less willing to put up with their crap. I don't need them to like me, I don't need the school to think I am a good teacher, so if they are being bratty I am a lot quicker to make it their problem and not mine. Since I got the news I have thrown 2 students out class, and made one whole class take a lap around the school (that was fun).
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Google Ads?
I just noticed that Google's Ad fu, which is supposed to match the content of this blog with appropriate ads, decided to give my blog ads for a dating service for Goths.
???
???
Cracking down
Last Thurs and Fri the kids took a test on quadrilaterals. I will now sum up the entire chapter:
Quadrilaterals have 4 sides.
Parallelograms have 2 pairs of parallel sides. Oppostite sides and angles are congruent, diagonals bisect each other
Rhombuses have 4 equal sides. Diagonals are perpendicular and bisect the angles of the rhombus.
Rectangles have 4 equal angles, all 90. Diagonals are congruent.
Trapezoids have exactly one pair of parallel sides.
Isosceles trapezoids have congruent legs, congruent diagonals, and congruent base angles.
Done.
The tests went horrible. In 2 classes the average was a D, in the other a B (but that class normally averages a high A).
I felt really bad about it. I am a bad teacher, I am not communicating well, etc.
I got some advice from other teachers about how to handle it, they suggested offering a retest.
Fine. We spend the entire class on Monday talking about the test, more on a meta level. How did you prepare? How do you study? What resources do you have available, etc? Then I offer them this deal: they correct the old test. When they give me corrections, they can take a retest, and I will average the grades. Pretty generous deal, I think.
Over the past week I have been working with them to get corrections done. This was an eye opening experience for me. I realize I have been mollycoddling them. I'm afraid that if they fail it's my fault, so I let them run me around. Any little question or problem, any time they get stuck, I gotta jump in and personally step them through it. I am realizing that that just doesn't work: they get the problem done but don't really learn anything.
The breaking point was a recent study hall, trying to get several students to do their corrections.
Student: I need help with this problem.
Me: We did a problem just like that in homework, look at that.
Student: Oh I threw that away.
Me: I WILL KILL YOU (not really).
Same student, later: Oh, I didn't throw it away, here it is. Now show me how to do it.
Me: Why not look at the paper (where the problem is written, all solved, because I did it with them in class)
Student: I want you to show me.
Student 2: I need help with this problem.
Me: OK. What shape is that?
Student 2: A rhombus.
Me: Yes. What properties does a rhombus have (you have to know the diagonals are perpendicular to do the problem)
Student: (blank stare)
Me: why don't you look in your notes to find that out.
Student: (blank stare)
(I go away for a few minutes and come back. Student is in the same position, just staring at the paper)
Student 3: I have my test corrections.
Me: (Looking them over). OK, this one and this one are still wrong.
Student 3: (Looking at a rhombus) Why? The angles are all 90 degrees, right?
Me: Why don't you look in your notes.
Student 3: I don't have them, they're in my locker.
Me: OK go get them from your locker.
Student 3: No, it's too far. Just tell me.
Me: Go get them from your locker.
Student 3: (Yelling) NO! It's right. I'm not doing it again because it's right.
Student 4: I need help with this problem (pointing to a problem in the book)
Me: Did you look at the example problem there (pointing to an identical problem, done step by step, on the facing page)
Student 4: Yes
Me: Really?
Student 4: Yes... (looking at it)... oh... (correctly explains how to do the problem)
SO, new resolution: I am going to make them work harder on their own before I give help. Sounds like a 'duh' now that I am saying it, but it feels like this big epiphany. It will make life a lot easier.
Quadrilaterals have 4 sides.
Parallelograms have 2 pairs of parallel sides. Oppostite sides and angles are congruent, diagonals bisect each other
Rhombuses have 4 equal sides. Diagonals are perpendicular and bisect the angles of the rhombus.
Rectangles have 4 equal angles, all 90. Diagonals are congruent.
Trapezoids have exactly one pair of parallel sides.
Isosceles trapezoids have congruent legs, congruent diagonals, and congruent base angles.
Done.
The tests went horrible. In 2 classes the average was a D, in the other a B (but that class normally averages a high A).
I felt really bad about it. I am a bad teacher, I am not communicating well, etc.
I got some advice from other teachers about how to handle it, they suggested offering a retest.
Fine. We spend the entire class on Monday talking about the test, more on a meta level. How did you prepare? How do you study? What resources do you have available, etc? Then I offer them this deal: they correct the old test. When they give me corrections, they can take a retest, and I will average the grades. Pretty generous deal, I think.
Over the past week I have been working with them to get corrections done. This was an eye opening experience for me. I realize I have been mollycoddling them. I'm afraid that if they fail it's my fault, so I let them run me around. Any little question or problem, any time they get stuck, I gotta jump in and personally step them through it. I am realizing that that just doesn't work: they get the problem done but don't really learn anything.
The breaking point was a recent study hall, trying to get several students to do their corrections.
Student: I need help with this problem.
Me: We did a problem just like that in homework, look at that.
Student: Oh I threw that away.
Me: I WILL KILL YOU (not really).
Same student, later: Oh, I didn't throw it away, here it is. Now show me how to do it.
Me: Why not look at the paper (where the problem is written, all solved, because I did it with them in class)
Student: I want you to show me.
Student 2: I need help with this problem.
Me: OK. What shape is that?
Student 2: A rhombus.
Me: Yes. What properties does a rhombus have (you have to know the diagonals are perpendicular to do the problem)
Student: (blank stare)
Me: why don't you look in your notes to find that out.
Student: (blank stare)
(I go away for a few minutes and come back. Student is in the same position, just staring at the paper)
Student 3: I have my test corrections.
Me: (Looking them over). OK, this one and this one are still wrong.
Student 3: (Looking at a rhombus) Why? The angles are all 90 degrees, right?
Me: Why don't you look in your notes.
Student 3: I don't have them, they're in my locker.
Me: OK go get them from your locker.
Student 3: No, it's too far. Just tell me.
Me: Go get them from your locker.
Student 3: (Yelling) NO! It's right. I'm not doing it again because it's right.
Student 4: I need help with this problem (pointing to a problem in the book)
Me: Did you look at the example problem there (pointing to an identical problem, done step by step, on the facing page)
Student 4: Yes
Me: Really?
Student 4: Yes... (looking at it)... oh... (correctly explains how to do the problem)
SO, new resolution: I am going to make them work harder on their own before I give help. Sounds like a 'duh' now that I am saying it, but it feels like this big epiphany. It will make life a lot easier.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Irritating
Today one of my students was abnormally out of it. Not paying attention, constantly talking. When I went by their desk they were just doodling. The really frustrating thing is the whole point of the class was to help them pass a test later this week, which this student in particular really needs help with.
When I asked afterwards (one on one) what's the deal, they told me I'm 'irritating'. "You're irritating. You irritate me. I don't like this class. I don't like you or the way you teach."
Yikes. So we talked about that a bit but at the end of the day I'm just irritating. I am filtering all this thru the reality of teen hormone-y-ness. One day a teen loves something and the next they hate it, and they generally operate in absolutes. So we'll see.
When I asked afterwards (one on one) what's the deal, they told me I'm 'irritating'. "You're irritating. You irritate me. I don't like this class. I don't like you or the way you teach."
Yikes. So we talked about that a bit but at the end of the day I'm just irritating. I am filtering all this thru the reality of teen hormone-y-ness. One day a teen loves something and the next they hate it, and they generally operate in absolutes. So we'll see.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
I'm a teacher
Kind of a 'well duh' by this point, but I especially noticed it today. I'm in, I'm doing this. And it's not bad at all.
Hard to get up today, so I got to class a bit later than I'd like. Hurried to stuff in order.
Given the short prep time, class went really well. I felt like I was able to pull in stuff from previous lessons and they got it. Nice split of time between me talking and them working. Some very nice "Aha!" moments for the kids.
And I realized I've got a catchphrase. Like when I was in school there was a teacher who was trying to get us to say that a certain thing in a book was a metaphor for sex but we were all embarrassed to say "sex" in class so she finally goes "It's SEX people, SEX!!". That lived forever.
So for me, when I notice someone is totally not listening to a question I'm asking, I'll say "What do *you* think, Joe?" (Or whoever), and they'll turn around and go "Whaaa???" and I go "ExAAActly". I think I got that from an episode of the Simpsons. Anyway, that "ExAAActly" is my thing, my thing that I do.
Hard to get up today, so I got to class a bit later than I'd like. Hurried to stuff in order.
Given the short prep time, class went really well. I felt like I was able to pull in stuff from previous lessons and they got it. Nice split of time between me talking and them working. Some very nice "Aha!" moments for the kids.
And I realized I've got a catchphrase. Like when I was in school there was a teacher who was trying to get us to say that a certain thing in a book was a metaphor for sex but we were all embarrassed to say "sex" in class so she finally goes "It's SEX people, SEX!!". That lived forever.
So for me, when I notice someone is totally not listening to a question I'm asking, I'll say "What do *you* think, Joe?" (Or whoever), and they'll turn around and go "Whaaa???" and I go "ExAAActly". I think I got that from an episode of the Simpsons. Anyway, that "ExAAActly" is my thing, my thing that I do.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Been a while
I realize I've kind of fallen off the wagon with keeping this up to date.
So the latest:
We did finals right before Christmas. Evidently this is the first year they've done that: previously they did finals right after break. I am *so* glad I didn't have to deal with that: trying to get everyone up to speed on a semester's worth of material after a 2 week break would be craziness.
They didn't go as well as I would have hoped. At the end the grades for the semester were reasonable: I generally feel like justice was done. But the grades for the finals themselves were pretty terrible.
I am still having trouble getting inside the heads of the kids who are struggling. Math is so basic to me, so common-sense-how-could-it-be-otherwise, that it's hard to figure out what's not connecting for someone who isn't getting it. The only thing I can say for sure is that for many of them, they approach math as a series of mystic runes to just memorize. It all makes no sense, nor will it ever: the best you can do is just remember these crazy formulas and spit them back. This becomes obvious on tests when you see a formula that's just a little off (forgetting to square differences in the distance formula) or used in the wrong place (distance formula instead of midpoints).
And what constantly surprises me with mistakes like this is kids will reach answers that are clearly, unmistakeably wrong (the midpoint of (0,2) and (4,3) is -57) and not even notice.
So I guess the battle is to challenge them to try to actually think/reason about what they're doing instead of just plug in numbers to some formula.
One very nice thing about teaching: the time off. Got 11 work days off over the holidays (so 2+ weeks). There will be another week break in February and a third in April. Then there's the summer. The whole. entire. summer.
I'd told myself when I started teaching that I might use the break to start some technical project (teach myself javascript) and then continue that project in my free time during the second semester. That didn't happen. Too busy relaxing/having fun. And I'm not feeling very motivated to start it now. With time away from programming I am feeling more comfortable saying "I don't like to do that" and not feeling guilty/ashamed of it. Still sorting out what that means for my future career, but at least I am coming to terms with it.
I almost feel like this is a 12 step program or something. "I'm Doug and I don't like programming and that's OK". (We love you Doug).
So the latest:
We did finals right before Christmas. Evidently this is the first year they've done that: previously they did finals right after break. I am *so* glad I didn't have to deal with that: trying to get everyone up to speed on a semester's worth of material after a 2 week break would be craziness.
They didn't go as well as I would have hoped. At the end the grades for the semester were reasonable: I generally feel like justice was done. But the grades for the finals themselves were pretty terrible.
I am still having trouble getting inside the heads of the kids who are struggling. Math is so basic to me, so common-sense-how-could-it-be-otherwise, that it's hard to figure out what's not connecting for someone who isn't getting it. The only thing I can say for sure is that for many of them, they approach math as a series of mystic runes to just memorize. It all makes no sense, nor will it ever: the best you can do is just remember these crazy formulas and spit them back. This becomes obvious on tests when you see a formula that's just a little off (forgetting to square differences in the distance formula) or used in the wrong place (distance formula instead of midpoints).
And what constantly surprises me with mistakes like this is kids will reach answers that are clearly, unmistakeably wrong (the midpoint of (0,2) and (4,3) is -57) and not even notice.
So I guess the battle is to challenge them to try to actually think/reason about what they're doing instead of just plug in numbers to some formula.
One very nice thing about teaching: the time off. Got 11 work days off over the holidays (so 2+ weeks). There will be another week break in February and a third in April. Then there's the summer. The whole. entire. summer.
I'd told myself when I started teaching that I might use the break to start some technical project (teach myself javascript) and then continue that project in my free time during the second semester. That didn't happen. Too busy relaxing/having fun. And I'm not feeling very motivated to start it now. With time away from programming I am feeling more comfortable saying "I don't like to do that" and not feeling guilty/ashamed of it. Still sorting out what that means for my future career, but at least I am coming to terms with it.
I almost feel like this is a 12 step program or something. "I'm Doug and I don't like programming and that's OK". (We love you Doug).
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